03 April 2007

It's Not Over 'Til...

The Game: Avs at Flames

This wasn't Altitude's (or the Flames') night. For the first ten minutes of play, only audio was available, accompanied by a still photo of the rink at Calgary. It made me think of those kitschy apartment-dwellers who invite company over for the holidays and put on a DVD of a burning yule log.

At last, the video feed was restored, and I didn't miss Phaneuf's first demonstration of douchebaggery [French for asshole-ness]. He trips Guite, and goes to the box. Friesen gets a short handed goal, and Clark responds with a PP goal less than one minute later.

At Intermission, Laperriere is asked what contributed to the last-minute resurgence. He 1) is disappointed/frustrated/amused at having been asked the same question 5,000 times (I wonder how they feel when asked, "How important was this game?"), and 2) explains that it took longer than expected for this group to "zhelle" as a team.

Then, not satisfied with earlier technical difficulties, Altitude introduces, begins to play, and promptly cuts a clip from next Saturday's Intermission report - a heartwarming look at Nashville's coach? On the other hand, I recently realized that I have underestimated Altitude personality Peter McNab. I thought he was a cheesy drunk, but now I know he's freakin' HARDCORE!

That's awesome. In the 2nd, it is announced that Budaj is the NHL's 1st Star of the Month. After the Flames score again, and Richardson and Stastny give the Avs the lead, I think, desperately, "they have to hold this for 24 minutes? Budaj has got to be a rock."

...Which takes me back to my Catholic school-girl days. Not in the Britney Spears way, in the Sister Act kind of way. Budaj has faith. He has faith in God, as well as in the God-given talent within himself and his teammates. I thank God, though, that he has the sense to thank inanimate objects like the posts. It occurs to me that his name is Peter. Of course. He is a Name of the Game. Not because his name is funny or unfortunate, like Hamrlik's, but because Peter means "rock," and [Hockey] Jesus told his beloved disciple of same name "you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hades will not overcome it." Whoa. Deep.

In the 3rd, it becomes obvious that, since the Avs have taken the lead, I am not the only one who wants to turn the clock forward a bit. McNab starts counting down the minutes when there's still 13 left. Then he remarks the Avs' "high-energy calm." OK, he's still a drunk.

Luckily, Sakic scores. He's spent an unusually long amount of time on the ice tonight.

Phaneuf draws a second penalty on the Avs by taking the most obvious and laughable dive. He is officially a tool. I'm sorry. He is an idiot jerk who happens to play hockey well. Put that in your "just like me and you" ad campaign, NHL. Do I have enough posts under my belt to call him a "fucktard" or an "asshat?" Because I want to. A dive. Nice work, Coach PLAYFAIR!

Langkow scores. So maybe Budaj is some kind of porous rock. Whatever. He's young.

The horn sounds at the end of the game, to a resounding BOO from Calgary fans. My last note? An all-caps "SHUT UP, CALGARY!" Ugh. You are under my skin, and I don't like you. I can't put it down to the fact that you are Canadian, because my beloved Sakic is, too. I don't know what's wrong with you, but I am going to find out. Jerks.


Avs 4
Flames 3

So, playoff hopes are still alive. Barely. It's too bad that these last three games are Vancouver, Nashville, and Calgary again. Oilers, save face and shame these guys. Sharks? Go JAWS on them. Avs...show them what happens to a flame in an AVALANCHE. I think you can.

Best Friends Forever!


No comments: