23 April 2007

The Game: Food and Shelter vs. Hockey



Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs

Ok. The Avs are out. The Stars are out. And I just moved out. As of this week I will live in a house without appliances or a functioning bathroom, so I kinda need to focus on making sure I can eat, sleep, and...well, you know.

I'm still watching. Still reading. Writing? I'll see you next season.

Best Friends Forever!

--Satanella

13 April 2007

Nyah, Nyah, Nyah

The Game: Stars at Canucks, Game 2

Playoff demons? Whatever. I love me some Turco.

FINAL

Stars 2
Canucks 0

Why Dallas, you ask? Yeah, there is something of a healthy rivalry between Oklahoma (my home state) and Texas. OK is kinda like quiet, plain kid nobody really notices, and TX is like that kid's older, bigger brother. It seems like everything comes easy to him, and everyone likes even though he can be a real ass.

That said, Dallas would be my nearest NHL team were I ever to move home. Had the Penguins moved to KC...I would have had two, I guess. About the same distance in flat, uninteresting terrain.

Have you been to Dallas? It's cool. I've been a few times, and every time my friends and I go to the Magic Time Machine restaurant, where local starving actors and actresses go to wait tables while practicing their craft. They stay in character all night, even if it means being a total dick. And you can order a Roman Orgy from the menu.

Ludwig is out of town again, rocking out in the mountains. He plays bass. And Satanella? Watching hockey out of the corner of my eye while I study PLUMBING of all things. It's scary. Last night I fell asleep ranting nonsensically about tile. Lud woke me up mid-nightmare, thinking some guy on a motorcycle was about to crash through our bedroom wall. The best, though? I thought FOR SURE this morning that I had read on Kukla's Korner that Theodore had resigned from the NHL. Ha!

Needless to say, I need sleep. Not sure how much of the next game I will catch. Just under two weeks until signing/move in/demolition day. I need to pack.

Best Friends Forever!

--Satanella

11 April 2007

Who Did? Who Died?

The Games: Penguins at Senators, Stars at Canucks (Game 1s - late post)

Potentially upsetting nearly everyone's predictions, the Pens died a slow, painful, and miserable death tonight. As if the whole youth and inexperience thing wasn't intimidating enough, this loss must be a psychological nightmare. It was the first time I've seen the Sens in action. They are good hockey. Although I think it would be good for hockey in general if The Crosby Show did well in the playoffs (today, his picture accompanied the only NHL-related link I've seen on Yahoo!'s front page), I won't be offended if the Senators take it. Questionable reffing and a good scrum make for an interesting non-Av playoff game. At first Intermission, I went to Whole Foods on a snack run, and overheard a lady saying, "...but I'm an Islander fan. And I still admit it!" Ha. To think that a year ago I would have had no idea what she meant.

FINAL

Penguins 3
Senators 6

Equally unexpectedly, the Stars DID tonight. Both they and the Canucks practically played two games, something I'm going to have to look into. Why does everyone hate the shootout again?

FINAL

Stars 4
Canucks 5

I have a love/hate relationship with commercials. I hate them for myriad reasons, but I love comparing who advertises where. The commercials you see during an episode of "Oprah" are radically different from those interrupting a show on MTV. Hockey fans, I suppose, are white males who take care of their homes, lawns, and...prostates. At least it seems that Quizno's has determined that their campaign was ill-directed for the audience, and pulled this gem:



Watch as the silent actress dies a little inside. It's probably just my imagination, but I think of her as one of those artists who was determined to sacrifice the quick road to fame, if it meant doing hemorrhoid and STD ads. And there she is, trying to retain her composure as another, less integrous female sets feminism back a couple of decades.

In other news, someone from Turkey recently found me by Google-ing "puke lovers." Further back, an unknown academe accessed me by researching "hockey players are good lovers." Interesting. Apparently HIFL is a booze-smelling alley in the hockey blogosphere. Shady and proud.

Best Friends Forever!

--Satanella

If You Can't Say Something Nice...

I may be preemptively compiling my farewell mix-tape for Jose Theodore, but I have to say that this is unbelievably cool:



What HAPPENED to you, Theo?

Best Friends Forever!

--Satanella

There Is Nothing Like A [Game]

We got sunlight on the sand, we got moonlight on the sea
We got mangoes and bananas you can pick right off a tree
We got volleyball and ping-pong and a lot o' dandy [d]ames
What we ain't got? We ain't got GAMES!

We got nothin' to put on a clean white shirt for
What we need there ain't no substitute for
There is nothing like a GAME, nothin' in the world
There is nothing you can name that is anything like a GAME!

We feel restless, we feel blue, we feel lonely and in grief
We feel every kind of feeling but the feeling of relief
We feel hungry as the wolf felt when he met Red Riding Hood
What we don't feel? We don't feel good!

Lot's of things in life are beautiful but - brother
There is one particular thing that is nothing whatsoever
In any way, shape or form like any other
There is nothing like a GAME, nothing in the world
There is nothing you can name that is anything like a GAME...

I can't pinpoint when South Pacific lodged itself in my head. Perhaps it's Post-Season Stress Disorder, or insanity brought on by grief.

Must charge on, though. Sakic signed. I understand that it's a ceremonious occasion, but he made it pretty clear around trade time that he plans on sticking around. AND there's GAMES tonight. I'll be rooting for the Penguins and the Stars. Yes, the Stars. Because I CAN.

Best Friends Forever!

--Satanella

08 April 2007

This Is The End, Beautiful Friend

The Games: Avs vs. Predators, Avs vs. Flames

Disclaimer: this post will be uninformative and inarticulate, because...



I am moving. Sorting through and packing up three years worth of two people's lives. Finally feeling free to get rid of those hideous unasked-for wedding presents, and memorabilia from college. I am stressed. Have to move in 19 days. Put an offer on a house today, for a comparatively modest (but ridiculous to me) sum of money. Will have to gut it, and live on soup from the hot pot for a while.

The Avs getting eliminated from the playoffs yesterday makes this time doubly poignant. Ah, the things we get attached to. Sometimes we hate them, sometimes they hurt us, but they are ours. As much as I hate this apartment, as I took down our art and pictures from the walls, it made me sad to see our home become sterile, lifeless, and utilitarian. Similarly, when the Preds scored that empty netter, I felt a little lonely, a little small, a little empty. I couldn't look at the guys' faces, it was too much.

That said, I'm glad it happened now. For the last two months, every game has been THE game. It has been the height of excitement and tension. The Avs were never coasting, there were no dispensable games. And the run they put together in that time was epic. A thing to see. Topped off by tonight's unfathomably satisfying win against the Flames, too.

I am proud of the guys. Budaj and Stastny surprised. Sakic continued to amaze. Brunette and Arnason had their best years in a while. The new guys (like Finger, and new/old guys like Parker) are promising additions to the team. And I love Laperriere for going out with a bang. NOTHING gives me more pleasure than that he kicked Phaneuf's stupid ass. I only wish I could have been there.

I can't help but look at the bright side of this. The Avs may not have made the playoffs, but the last couple of months have reestablished them as a formidable opponent. And I have no doubt that the sting of not making the playoffs for the first time in franchise history will make for an extra hungry next season. Look the hell out.

Also, I have to confess a certain amount of relief. I can watch the playoffs while I am refinishing walls and hardwood floors dating from 1927. I will learn more about other teams, but no game will be of particular concern to me. Without a doubt, I have developed a love for hockey and the Avs. But if the process of getting a house has induced stress-related spider-coming-out-of-cheeseball nightmares, I can't predict what tiling a bathroom and installing new siding will do.

One more thing. Avs fans have taken a lot of flack lately for having hope. That's a shame. There is nothing wrong with rooting for the underdog, and anyone who thinks otherwise doesn't get it. Especially when that underdog all of the sudden starts playing like it was raised by wolves!

I hope to continue to post as regularly as possible during the playoffs and off-season, but I'm not sure how soon I will have the computer/TV set up after the move. I will tell you to look forward to at least one post - I have hockey related plans for the first use of our new stove, whenever that happens.

Another thing. It has been an honor to be even remotely part of the community of hockey bloggers. There is nothing more inspiring to me (and nothing that I miss more about the "good old days" of school) than associating with passionate people. And you are interesting and intelligent, too. Thank you, if you are reading this. With only half a season under my belt, I know I am unworthy.

Best Friends Forever!

--Satanella

06 April 2007

I Believe

The Game: Avs at Canucks

Woooooaah. That is all. Just kidding.

A quick pregame glance. Laperriere + Shy childr
en = Funny. Lappy: "How you doing? [reads her shirt] 'Mini Diva.' I like dat."

Hejduk scores 25 seconds in. Unbelievable! It's fast and furious until Brunette crashes into Luongo and seems to step on his junk (ahem, interfere with his crease). A goal off of Naslund's skate gets taken away...Lucky...

Extremely lucky, since Salo ties it up less than a minute later. But everyone is working hard, including the venerable Sakic, who spends his lion's share of ice time under tremendous pressure. After the Avs aren't able to capitalize on three fortuitous Canuck penalties, I write in my notes, "Hejduk still hot. Any other goalie, could have hat trick by now." I think back to his last...

My reverie is interrupted by another McNab gem, just before second Intermission: "...Their minds are working so hard inside those masks..."

Hejduk gets his hat trick in the third. Who called it? That's right. The next best thing to throwing some hats onto the ice:



In honor of "The Duke," the ducal coronet of the Master of the Royal Household of Scotland. And if that doesn't float his boat:


Nothing helps you relax after an impossible win like a couple of frosty...root beers? Riiight.

FINAL

Avs 3
Canucks 1

What could make this night better? Well, two things. Calgary lost to San Jose [taps fingertips repeatedly; maniacal sneer]. And, I went to a Guinness Believer event, drank copious amounts of free Irish beer, and added to my growing collection of Guinness family drinking paraphernalia:



The little spoons are for pouring Black and Tans. I don't drink them often enough to keep the thing on my keychain, though...

Happy Fan Appreciation Day, Vancouver! Best Friends Forever!

--Satanella

03 April 2007

It's Not Over 'Til...

The Game: Avs at Flames

This wasn't Altitude's (or the Flames') night. For the first ten minutes of play, only audio was available, accompanied by a still photo of the rink at Calgary. It made me think of those kitschy apartment-dwellers who invite company over for the holidays and put on a DVD of a burning yule log.

At last, the video feed was restored, and I didn't miss Phaneuf's first demonstration of douchebaggery [French for asshole-ness]. He trips Guite, and goes to the box. Friesen gets a short handed goal, and Clark responds with a PP goal less than one minute later.

At Intermission, Laperriere is asked what contributed to the last-minute resurgence. He 1) is disappointed/frustrated/amused at having been asked the same question 5,000 times (I wonder how they feel when asked, "How important was this game?"), and 2) explains that it took longer than expected for this group to "zhelle" as a team.

Then, not satisfied with earlier technical difficulties, Altitude introduces, begins to play, and promptly cuts a clip from next Saturday's Intermission report - a heartwarming look at Nashville's coach? On the other hand, I recently realized that I have underestimated Altitude personality Peter McNab. I thought he was a cheesy drunk, but now I know he's freakin' HARDCORE!



That's awesome. In the 2nd, it is announced that Budaj is the NHL's 1st Star of the Month. After the Flames score again, and Richardson and Stastny give the Avs the lead, I think, desperately, "they have to hold this for 24 minutes? Budaj has got to be a rock."

...Which takes me back to my Catholic school-girl days. Not in the Britney Spears way, in the Sister Act kind of way. Budaj has faith. He has faith in God, as well as in the God-given talent within himself and his teammates. I thank God, though, that he has the sense to thank inanimate objects like the posts. It occurs to me that his name is Peter. Of course. He is a Name of the Game. Not because his name is funny or unfortunate, like Hamrlik's, but because Peter means "rock," and [Hockey] Jesus told his beloved disciple of same name "you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hades will not overcome it." Whoa. Deep.

In the 3rd, it becomes obvious that, since the Avs have taken the lead, I am not the only one who wants to turn the clock forward a bit. McNab starts counting down the minutes when there's still 13 left. Then he remarks the Avs' "high-energy calm." OK, he's still a drunk.

Luckily, Sakic scores. He's spent an unusually long amount of time on the ice tonight.

Phaneuf draws a second penalty on the Avs by taking the most obvious and laughable dive. He is officially a tool. I'm sorry. He is an idiot jerk who happens to play hockey well. Put that in your "just like me and you" ad campaign, NHL. Do I have enough posts under my belt to call him a "fucktard" or an "asshat?" Because I want to. A dive. Nice work, Coach PLAYFAIR!

Langkow scores. So maybe Budaj is some kind of porous rock. Whatever. He's young.

The horn sounds at the end of the game, to a resounding BOO from Calgary fans. My last note? An all-caps "SHUT UP, CALGARY!" Ugh. You are under my skin, and I don't like you. I can't put it down to the fact that you are Canadian, because my beloved Sakic is, too. I don't know what's wrong with you, but I am going to find out. Jerks.

FINAL

Avs 4
Flames 3

So, playoff hopes are still alive. Barely. It's too bad that these last three games are Vancouver, Nashville, and Calgary again. Oilers, save face and shame these guys. Sharks? Go JAWS on them. Avs...show them what happens to a flame in an AVALANCHE. I think you can.

Best Friends Forever!

--Satanella